Step right up folks to the greatest shitshow on earth! Grab a box of Barnum's animal cookies and a tissue because you are going to be laughing so hard you're crying, or crying so hard you're vomiting, out of all holes. So what is this? I leave for a few months and come back to what resembles a really spectacular episode of Intervention, starring El Presidente Obama with a problem of compulsive spending, only it's not on loafers and hispanic hookers, it's on the UNTIED STATES OF AMERICA and yes I meant to write untied, because the only time I can recall some good old fashioned unity was when Bin Laden was killed, and 9.11. I think the whole cabinet needs to go Debtors Anonymous, anonymity, should reel politicians right in! So basically, as of right now and climbing at an incredible rate the debt ceiling (although I don't know why they call it that because it obviously has no ceiling! HA play me off keyboard cat!) is at a fugly number $14,583,255,200,900 quasimajigachamillionum U.S DOLLARS, thats about $125 million dollars an hour 24/7 and that ain't goin' to yo' momma, thats going to Asia. The U.S has now put themselves in the position of a multi-colored old, sweaty man with a gambling problem that keeps asking for money and swears he's going to pay you back guy, and I don't mean multi-colored racially, but like you can't tell if thats poop or dirt, and what is that mauve? Essentially, I hope everyone looks good in crotchless fishnets because we're all going to get fucked, and I will not apologize for my foul mouth until the inept leader of our country apologizes for being such a big fat PHONY. Where the shittles, taste that rainblow, is all of this money going?! I realize there is Social Security, research, medicare, welfare, wars, a lot of cashola..but then it gets my mouse running, if we are in this big of a debt pickle, why does the U.S government still insist on giving money to other countries, to greaseball politicians that receive fat checks monthly. It is substantially UN-clear to me how this got so dire, so quickly and yardy yardy yar-har everyone will point their grubby fingers at Bush, but the government is a marionette show and the faces we see are attached to the strings attached to the puppeteers that run the show, the puppeteers that have been and will continue to squander what dignity and power we may have left, and why? I don't know, maybe some secret alliance with Asia and thats why they are irreverent in panic, panic because China and Japan are going to be running this country, and every other country. Not only has the U.S been greedy, but Europe as well, that is why businesses are now Barney Rubble or have left this country. Because we have been so greedy to buy everything cheap, and where do they make that? Not here, thats why our economy is a dingle-berry blowing in the wind, because businesses here have to hike up the prices, because of all the regulations and taxes and so we are amounted to this vicious unruly cycle, because we have to hike up the prices to pay for this debt that keeps growing and the interest is obscene and AHHHH my poor enormous brain.
I realize that the argument, and discussions that have been televised recently have been about spending cuts, but what I would like to know is why they don't have that available to be viewed by the public? I've seen the pictures, and they are adorable with the grim faces and cups of tea but what are they saying in there? For all we know they could be recounting the wonderful meatloaf they had for dinner or how excited they were to all go and see the new smurf movie after Barack yo mamabama finished his spizeech. I am sorry people but my faith in this government and country has dwindled faster than Charlie Sheen's sperm count on a Friday night at Juggalo's. (Real strip club? I hope so..) I mean we're pretty darn low at this point I wouldn't be surprised if the next motion of action was to inaugurate SallyAnn Salsano, creator of such works as "A shot at love with Tila Tequila" or "Tool Academy" or who could forget that stroke of genius, "The Jersey Shore" which has broke some record of popularity that I could NOT be bothered to look at because I didn't want to roundhouse my computer screen. I hope to add more on this topic later, but it has been a long while since my days of blogging and with all of this asinine jambalaya I feel like my medulla oblongata, is going to medulla oblongotta-get-outta-here. Peace and Blessins. And don't forget to check out the song of the day-oh!
