Naughty Naughty Al Gore

I remember not too long ago the visions of sugarplums and polar bears drowning from melting ice caps dancing in my head, yeah the polar bears and holes in o-zones and small children in commercials giving guilt trips because I left my bathroom light on last night.. Global Warming was and still is a big fat phony pink elephant breaking wind in my living room. What is burning my buttons now is that Global Warming seems faker than ads from Hydroxycut..but the citizens of the world seem to be eating it up like an addiction to pringles, once you pop you really can't stop. Just take a look at your handy weather "apps" it's cold as an eskimo's balls outside. (seriously the water pipes at my house are frozen and I fear for my hygiene)  Glaciers in Antartica and Greenland are getting thicker not thinner as some "scientists" have declared. NASA was actually caught hot tamale red-handed using weather temperatures from September for October. It's my belief that it is for gluttonous companies that are taking advantage of naive, unwary humans that have been duped into the "green scene". It's a fad that is endorsed world-wide by pretty-faced celebs driving down Santa Monica blvd in their hybrid Prius' smoking their electronic cigarettes.  Think about all the green products on the shelves these days, washers, dryers, toilet paper, diapers, back hair shavers, light bulbs are being phased out because they apparently use more energy. So now, we will have to buy and use fluorescent lights, that actually use more energy to turn on and also contain mercury, so to all you butterfingers out there, go buy some flashlights and a buttload of candles because if you drop that bulb you just may grow a third arm out of your bung hole or your brain will just take form of an avocado. Our society is mostly familiar with the "human-caused global-warming" idea, but it has been set forth that this is just the cycle the Earth naturally goes through, kinda like menstruation without the bloating and tears. Think about the human body, all of our nerves, cells, organs, veins all naturally working together within itself, when you get sick you have anti-bodies to help you heal, when you get a contusion you don't do anything to it and it heals on its own. The Earth is fundamentally the same, everything on the Earth serves a purpose, oceans, mountains, volcanoes, rivers etc. In fact, volcanoes produce the 3 amigos, sulfur dioxide, carbon dioxide and carbon monoxide among other gases, which all pollute, how come we don't see environmentalists picketing and rioting at the foot of Mt. Saint-Helen's? Sure that lava looks hot, but its polluting! And now we get to good old Al Gore, or as I like to call him Al Bore, seriously I'd rather whittle the cast of "Frasier" out of bars of soap than listen to that man speak. I never saw that chick-flick, "An Inconvenient Truth", although I heard it was a real tear-jerker,  but I'm sure he's laughing it up on his beach front home in Malibu about how convenient it was for him with all his stocks in GE and other "green" technology. It really makes me wonder why he even bought a home on the coast of California when according to him it's going to be joining Davy Jones locker soon. Maybe he's just a big Johnny Depp fan. I just get so cold and bothered thinking about all the half-truths and white-lies and chain-yankers everyone is exposed to, I feel blind and deaf when it comes to the United States and the people that run it and even my feeling is getting faulty. I can't help but feel swindled when it comes to things like Global Warming and organic and things like that because everyone is out passing the buck and only looking out for themselves. I think what we should really be concerned about is Global Greed. So put that in your cornish game hen and stuff it.
                                                         Global Warming Protestors